


Breaking Free is the Hardest Part

by Illusinia



Series: Elements of Life [1]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-18
Updated: 2014-05-23
Packaged: 2018-01-25 13:46:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 17,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1650797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Illusinia/pseuds/Illusinia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ward leaned forward a little, like he was going to push away from the wall. “I'm sorry. I'll save you.” Then he was pushing back and taking Skye's arm carefully in his grasp. He looked her over once before looping it over his shoulder, like she needed help to walk. She didn't need it, but she let him guide her arm around his shoulders all the same. Ward had said he was a survivor, and so was she.</p><p>Trigger Warning: Abuse</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Waking Up The Second Time Is Harder Than The First

A pounding pain crawled through Skye's head as she slowly became aware f her surroundings, obnoxiously familiar and persistent. _Ugh, I'm gonna have brain damage if this keeps up._ The world felt stable for the moment, but she knew the second she opened her eyes that everything would tilt violently. If she didn't get sick to her stomach, it would be a miracle. _Well, this might come close to winning the award for crappiest day of my life. No, who am I kidding? Getting shot was worse. Actually, that might be debatable. Being kidnapped by Hydra is pretty bad._

 

Voices began to leak into her ears from near by, faint but present. She was careful not to move, trying to focus on the sounds to determine what was happening, but they were impossible for her to identify.  _Great, so I'm surrounded by who knows who and I've been unconscious. So, that means I'm who knows where, in who knows who's hands. Wow, I need a better word than who. Ugh, okay Skye, play dead and come up with a plan. C'mon, you're smart, or you were before Ward decided to gift you with brain damage. Figure out a way to escape. This is the second time this has happened today, let's not make it a third!_

 

The sensation of someone gently lifting her head up and running a hand over her skull brought Skye's attention fully back to her reality.  _Huh, well, that's more caring than I expected. If that's Ward though, I'm gonna punch him._

 

She was tempted to open her eyes, but there was no way to do that without making it obvious she was awake, and she didn't want to do that until she knew who was in the room with her. The voices had shut up by now, only speaking up occasionally and more as murmurs than actual voices. Her hearing was coming back, thankfully, so she could make out the sound of at least one woman and one man in the room. Neither voice was near her head though and both were strangely accented. It took her a second to realize she was hearing the familiar British accents of Fitz and Simmons. They were arguing from what she could tell, their words becoming clearer as her hearing returned. 

 

_So I'm with the others, they found me. I'm safe again._ Relief overtook her as she felt her whole body relax and she let her eyes slowly blink open without concern. 

 

As she'd thought, the world tilted dangerously but it was mercifully dim in the space. Coulson's worried face blinked down at her, giving her something to focus on. It helped with the vertigo-esque tipping. Seriously, she felt like she was on a ship in the middle of a storm. Despite the discomfort though, she forced her focus on Coulson. Her boss looked like he'd been through hell, and she really couldn't blame him. After what Garrett had revealed, she wouldn't look much better.

 

It took some effort, but she managed to raise her hand to grip Coulson's where it lay beside her head in his lap. With her eyes open, she could see they were still in that stupid escape tunnel. She was almost afraid to turn her head, to look away from Coulson. Being in that tunnel meant that Garrett's broken, bloody body was probably laying just feet away unless Ward had moved it while she was out.

 

Coulson looked down at her silently, meeting her eyes as he squeezed her hand. The heartbreak written across his face was painful, almost visceral. Like a punch to the gut. _God, the hell he must be going through. Poor AC._

 

Offering him a smile and a reassuring hand squeeze, she closed her eyes and tried to sit up. One of Coulson's hands landed on her upper back, helping to guide her into a sitting position. He left it there as she took several deep breaths and tried to fight back the vertigo and accompanying nausea. Both passed faster this time though, probably because she suspected the first time she'd been knocked out that day had involved drugs and not a strike to the head. Not like this one, which had definitely been a hit to the head. Her jacket shifted as she sat up, a foreign weight pulling it to one side. _What the...there wasn't anything in my pocket earlier._

 

Keeping her eyes closed, she slipped one of her hands into her pocket, seeking the item that was weighing her down so unnaturally. Smooth leather met her touch, her fingers tracing over a lip edge and smooth, rounded corners. A badge case, like the ones they'd all carried before Hydra came crawling out of the woodwork. There didn't seem to be anything dangerous about it though, so she left it where it was. The case hadn't been in her pocket before Ward knocked her out; that meant it was placed there while she was unconscious, probably by Ward. What the hell could he feel the need to give her?

 

Before she could remove the case though, there was a noise and then Simmons was shouting. Eyes shooting open, Skye came face to face with the British biochemist as the other woman began examining her eyes. A rapid line of science babble came from the smaller woman as she grabbed Skye's eyelid and tried to yank it up. Skye instinctively bolted backwards, landing on Coulson who was careful to steady her with a hand to her shoulder.

 

“Simmons, enough,” ordered Coulson calmly, keeping his hand on Skye's shoulder and squeezing gently. “You can check her for a concussion when we're back on the Bus. Right now, we need to get out of here.”

 

“Please,” choked out Skye, her voice rough as she rubbed her head gingerly. Her fingers brushed the fresh bump on the back of her head from where Ward had clocked her, making her wince. Damn, Ward. “Where's Ward?”

 

Simmons glanced back at Fitz, who looked a little uneasily at Coulson. Skye carefully turned her head to look back at Coulson, giving him a worried look. If they weren't talking, something was seriously wrong. Her stomach flipped at the thought that they might have seriously hurt or killed Ward. He'd been alive after he took out Garrett... “What? What happened?”

 

“Skye-” started Coulson, the look on his face painful as he started to speak. Shouting from behind the older agent cut him off though. Coulson glanced back at someone further down the tunnel, drawing his attention along with that of Simmons and Fitz. Carefully, Skye leaned on one of her hands to look around her boss, trying to spot whoever was coming towards them. It took her a moment to realize it was Triplett.

 

The specialist was jogging up the tunnel towards them, looking like he'd been going for a while. He came to a stop before them a second later, leaning forward to brace his hands on his knees and breathing hard. “Wow, that's a long tunnel.” Taking a deep breath, he looked up at all four of the team members, smiling crookedly at Skye when he noticed she was awake. “Hey Skye, glad to see you back among the living.”

 

“Triplett, any sign of him?” broke in Coulson before Skye could respond, looking worriedly at the other agent. Skye wanted to hug Coulson, he looked so miserable.

 

Mouth tightening to a tight line, Triplett shook his head sadly. “No sign of him. I'm thinkin' he must have used some side exit I couldn't find, because I didn't see any way out of this place.”

 

“Ward?” questioned Skye. It was stupid, who else would they be looking for? Garrett was dead, after all.

 

“Yeah,” confirmed Triplett, shaking his head a little and looking at something down the tunnel and off to the side. Following his line of sight, Skye could just make out the outline of an unmoving body. Garrett's, most likely. “Ward did a number on Garrett.”

 

“Garrett threatened-,” her voice broke before she could say more as the fuzzy memory of Ward taking the Beserker staff to Garrett's head assaulted her. She remembered why, too. Garrett had threatened to kill her, leave her body as a 'gift' to Coulson. Use her as bait. Ward had wanted to let her go.

 

“Threatened what, Skye?” pressed Coulson softly, his eyes looking at her pleadingly. “Who or what did Garrett threaten?”

 

“Me,” whispered Skye, her eyes sliding shut again as her eyes began to tear up. She needed to get herself under control. Ward had killed a man, it didn't matter that he'd done it to protect her or that said man happened to be an intolerable asshole and psychopath. Ward had killed another person. “Garrett threatened me, and Ward just-” Her voice broke again as her mind was overwhelmed by the memory of the attack's violence. “God Coulson, what he did-”

 

“It's alright Skye,” assured Coulson softly, drawing her into a hug. “It's okay. It'll all be okay.”

 

“Sir, we really should be going,” pointed out Simmons gently, though she didn't move from her place a few steps in front of Fitz. “Garrett and Ward may be gone, but the others are not and the military may well arrive soon.”

 

“Right,” croaked Phil, keeping his grip on Skye as he shifted to rise to one knee. He kept his arms firmly around her, carefully drawing her to her feet as he stood. The assistance was a relief, especially when her legs didn't initially want to hold her. “Skye, can you walk?”

 

“Yeah,” stated Skye firmly, determined to not weigh her team down in their escape. Her legs felt weak and it would be tricky with her head still spinning, but she would do it. “Give me a minute to get my legs going.”

 

“Here, lean on me,” stated Triplett as he approached, reaching out with one arm while keeping his gun firmly in his other hand.

 

Coulson shifted to stop his approach, shaking his head. “No, I want you and May free in case we hit trouble. I'll help Skye. I've fought with injured personal leaning on me before.”

 

“I'll be fine,” broke in Skye as her head finally stopped spinning. That didn't mean moving would be easy, but hey, she could try. Her legs felt a little steadier too, though again she'd see if it held when she moved. That would be the million dollar question. “I can walk.”

 

“You were hit in the head, Skye,” stated Coulson firmly, fishing his own gun out and taking her weight on one side of his body. “We aren't going to risk it. Now, let's move.”

 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

It took them fifteen minutes to reach an exit, backtracking through the base and out a secret door rather than the way down via barber chair that she'd taken. Of course there was a back entrance, there was always a back entrance. What would an evil base be without a back entrance? At least Skye was mostly standing on her own by the time they reached the exit. Coulson was hovering like a worried hen, but it was kinda understandable. Especially since she'd stumbled a few times getting out there (the damn floor was uneven! Really...).

 

May was waiting out in the alley with a van. She looked irritated and a little scuffed up, though there were no bodies around. That didn't mean the bodies weren't near by, of course, and she could see some dumpsters that looked like promising targets.

 

The pilot nodded at them once as they approached, pulling open the van's doors and climbing into the driver seat to start the engine. Simmons and Fitz nearly dove into the back seat, Simmons turning once she was inside to help Skye in. The hacker took the offered hand, carefully ducking as she climbed inside with Coulson standing behind her, a steadying hand on her lower back.

 

Triplett climbed in last, pulling the door shut as Coulson ran around the van to climb into the front passenger seat. They were away in seconds, just as the sound of helicopters began to echo in the distance. Local police cars came racing into sight along with military vehicles in their rear view mirror just as they turned off the main street calmly. May gunned it as soon as they were out of sight, cutting through back streets so fast Skye was surprised they didn't hit anything.

 

No one spoke, choosing silence to speech in the aftermath of the day as the shock finished settling in. It was almost impossible to comprehend everything that had happened. Really, it felt like a bad dream and if it weren't for the headache and lump she was sporting, Skye might have been able to assume it was.

 

“Well, that was something,” stated Fitz suddenly, sending Skye nearly jumping out of her seat. She glared at the engineer over the seat back, as did Simmons from beside him.

 

Triplett gave him a 'really dude?' look, shaking his head before leaning forward to talk to Coulson. “So what's our plan, sir?”

 

Up front, Coulson leaned forward, balancing his elbows on his knees and clasping his hands together as he stared out the windshield. His fingers folded against his lips, eyes locked on some phantom memory. “We move forward, keep hunting down Hydra.”

 

“What about Ward?” asked Simmons softly. “We can't just leave him out there.”

 

“We can and we will,” stated Coulson quietly, his voice breaking slightly as he spoke. “We'll keep an eye out for him, but he isn't our priority. He has too many safe houses, too many places to hide. We'll never find him if he doesn't want to be found.”

 

The words cut through part of Skye, the part that was still holding out hope for Ward. She'd seen in that day, in his eyes as he spoke to her, in the way he'd defended her against Garrett, the man he was under everything. She'd _seen_ the good in him again, even if he'd beaten Garrett to death in the process.

 

“Skye?” Simmons' voice brought Skye back to reality seconds before she felt the biochemist touch her shoulder. “Skye, did you hear me?”

 

“What?” asked Skye, blinking back at the biochemist. Her headache was beginning to get to her a little, though the pain was gradually subsiding some. “Sorry, my brain kinda wondered off. What'd you say?”

 

Simmons sighed worriedly as she looked at Skye like she thought the other woman might pass out any minute. “How are you feeling?”

 

“Better,” assured Skye, offering Simmons a smile. “My head is killing me, but otherwise, I'm better.”

 

“No swimming vision or nausea?” pressed Simmons, the doctor in her coming out full tilt.

 

“Only if I move my head too fast,” replied Skye with a shrug. “I think that's pain more than anything though.”

 

Nodding slowly, Simmons leaned back a little. She still looked worried but less so. “I want to check you for a concussion when we reach the Bus. You need to stay awake until then.”

 

“Not gonna be a problem,” chuckled Skye darkly. “I don't think I could sleep now if I wanted to.”

 

For a moment, the van went silent again as the day settled back into everyone's minds. God, had it really only been a day? It felt like three had passed.

 

“What happened anyway, Skye?” asked Fitz suddenly, drawing all attention in the van except for that of Phil and May's to her. She knew the older agents were listening carefully though. 

 

Sighing, Skye leaned her head back against the seat. Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath and tried to figure out where to begin. Which, well, was pretty much where she started remembering things. “It's kinda fuzzy. I remember going into the warehouse, then nothing until I woke up...”

 

 


	2. Waking Up and Getting Caught

-12 hours ago-

 

Pain was the first thing Skye really recognized as the world slowly began to materialize as more than a spinning sensation. Her head was pounding but somehow, she wasn't surprised by that. What surprised her more was the fact that she, somehow, wasn't dead. That was the bigger shocker.

 

It took a moment for her to register the cool metal beneath her cheek and the fact that she could move her arms. So she wasn't handcuffed and she was laying on a metal surface. Well, at least she really wasn't dead. Otherwise, she'd probably be feeling dirt. Experimentally, she shifted her legs and found that those, too, were free. Huh. So she wasn't restrained. Maybe she'd get lucky....

 

Opening her eyes, Skye prayed she'd find herself in a room with a nice, open door. Sadly, she wasn't that lucky. Well she wasn't restrained, the door to the room definitely wasn't open. She'd half expected to wake up in the interrogation room of the Bus, but this didn't look like the Bus' interrogation room. The walls were made of slate gray metal and the floor was the same dark color. Nothing else was in the room, not that it really surprised Skye. She'd probably been thrown in there just to hold her until she woke up.

 

Her fingers traced gingerly over her skull as she pushed herself into a sitting position, though she couldn't feel a lump or sign of being hit. One hand remained braced on the floor just to keep the world level as she tried to look around. Everything was kinda turning a bit, though she was gradually starting to feel less like she had just stepped off a tilt-a-whirl. Standing still didn't sound appealing though. Idly, she wondered how long it would be before she had to actually stand up. Hopefully, not before she regained her ability to see straight.

 

_What happened anyway? I remember that alley, the warehouse, then someone was running and there was a noise... ow, damn headache. I can't think straight. Ugh, okay Skye, pull it together. You need to figure out where you are and how to get back to the others. Worry about how you were taken out later, when you know someone's not gonna come through that door to use your body as a punching bag._

 

Escape would be the hardest part, largely because she probably wasn't lucky enough to have just been left alone with an unlocked door. Even if the door was unlocked, someone was probably guarding it. Really, what's the point in throwing someone in what's basically a prison if you aren't gonna either lock them in or guard them? _I just wish I could remember who got me._

 

That was the million dollar question: who'd knocked her out and dragged her to the most barren hotel room ever? And why? What did anyone want with her? Well, okay, that was probably a stupid question. Hydra wanted everyone who was formerly or currently SHIELD in their hands. And she was probably on their wish-list because of her hacking skills alone.

 

_Wonder how long I have before someone shows up to check on me?_ She really needed a plan before that happened. It was impossible to guess when someone would show up, of course. It might be in seconds or hours. Either way, she needed to at least try to escape before that.

 

Carefully, she pushed herself into a standing position and braced herself on the wall. Vertigo struck her again as she tried to keep her feet under her, nearly sending her on her ass once more.  _Ugh, what was I dosed with?_ It had to be a drug; she didn't have any kind of mark that indicated a physical attack.

 

With another deep breath, she began to shuffle towards the door in the room. If she was lucky, it was unlocked. If she was lucky, Coulson would be waiting on the other side of the door. Who was she kidding? She was never that lucky.

 

She never even made it to the door. When she was about half way around the side wall, the door to the room began to squeak open. It hadn't been locked then, so she could have escaped. Damn.

 

Taking a deep breath, she flattened her back to the wall and waited for her captor to enter. The thought of dropping to the floor and playing dead fleetingly crossed her mind, but it was never a serious one. It wouldn't do her any good and she'd just have a hard time struggling to get back up again. She wasn't exactly in a good position for a physical fight, even if the room wasn't spinning. Right now, the best she could do was use the wall as a brace. At least she could still kick someone in the balls.

 

It felt like ages before the door opened completely, revealing the last person Skye wanted to see but the first she probably should have expected. 

 

Ward stood in front of her, a bottle of water in one hand and the other braced on the door. He looked more ragged than she'd expected: his stubble was more persistent than it had been before and his hair wasn't as neatly controlled as usual. Whatever he'd been doing, it wasn't leaving him much time to maintain his normal grooming tendencies. Or maybe this is just how he preferred to look. She had to admit, if she weren't disgusted by him right now, it would be hot.

 

“Good, you're awake,” stated Ward, stepping into the room and holding out the water bottle to her. He kept space between them, either recognizing she was too unsteady still to do much to him or knowing from the way she was standing that she could lash out. Probably both if she had to guess; damn tactical mind-reader that he was.

 

She didn't move to take the bottle, despite being thirsty as hell. It could be drugged after all. Who knew what Ward might have done to the bottle before offering it to her? She didn't even know why he had brought her here, or where  _here_ even was. “Where are we?”

 

“A safe house,” replied Ward, wiggling the bottle of water at her. “C'mon Skye, you've gotta drink some water. There's nothing in it, I promise.”

 

“Yeah? And how am I supposed to trust you?” snapped Skye, eyes narrowing as she leaned more on the wall behind her. “For all I know that's some kinda mind-control juice.”

 

“Mind cont- seriously Skye?” challenged Ward, both eyebrows shooting up in disbelief. “Mind control juice?”

 

Skye had the presence of mind to feel a little sheepish about that one. But seriously, what was she supposed to think? It wasn't like he hadn't betrayed them all for Hydra. She tried to look as confident as possible when she responded, though it felt kinda ridiculous given she needed a wall to stand up. “Yeah, mind control juice. It's totally a thing Hydra'd have stashed away somewhere.”

 

Ward made a sound that might have been aborted amusement and stepped closer with the water. “Seriously Skye, you need water. I promise, there's nothing in it.”

 

“Your promises don't mean anything, Ward,” growled Skye, pressing closer to the wall. “Betrayal kinda revokes all rights to trust, ya know.” He was too close for her tastes and she really, really wished her legs were for sure strong enough to let her move. She wasn't shaking any more, which was better then before, but that didn't mean she could actually stand and fight him. Not that she could have ever taken Ward in a physical fight unarmed, but it would have made her feel at least a little less like a cornered animal.

 

Ward let out a frustrated noise, the hand holding the bottle tightening for a moment as if he wanted to squeeze it until the lid popped off. Taking a deep breath, he forced his grip to relax and carefully set the bottle on the ground between them, sweeping back to his feet and stepping away calmly. “Examine the bottle for yourself. No tears, no holes, no openings and I don't have the equipment here to tamper with it.”

 

Did he really think she was that stupid? “How do I know you didn't get it from a tampered with Hydra stash?”

 

“Because Hydra doesn't keep _mind control water_ on hand. Do you want me to show you the receipt?” asked Ward, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration. When he looked back up at her, his eyes pleaded silently with her to just do what he asked. It didn't do anything to really help reassure her though. “Okay, look, if I drink from it first, then will you?”

 

“Why is it so important that I drink your damn water, Ward?” challenged Skye, squaring her shoulders a little against the wall. All this pushing to get her to drink the water was really, really making her suspicious. The whole 'drugged water' theory was starting to become a serious consideration. “Huh?”

 

“Because I'm worried about you,” stated Ward through clenched teeth, crouching to pick up the bottle again and opening the cap. He remained kneeling on the floor as he took a gulp or two himself before offering the bottle to her. “See? I'm fine.”

 

Skye continued to glare at him, but she had to admit she was thirsty. Really thirsty. And the water might help her get her legs back, assuming it wasn't drugged. Then again, why would he drink drugged water? Plus, it might be worth the risk if it would put her in a better position to fight him. Taking the bottle, with a shaking hand, she held it close to her body for a moment, watching him for signs of something to happen. Ward didn't say or do anything in return, just remained where he was, watching her.

 

When she thought five minutes had passed and he didn't twitch, move, or fall over, she carefully took an experimental sniff. No weird scent emitted from the bottle, though Ward raised one eyebrow in a 'really Skye?' gesture. Making a face in return, she took an experimental sip and held it for a second. She couldn't taste anything weird either. By now, Ward was giving her his 'see?' look.  _Well, e xcuse me for being cautious when dealing with a damn traitor._

 

Swallowing the sip, she carefully drank about half the bottle before hugging it to her chest. Having the weight in her hands was a comfort, even though a water bottle wasn't exactly a weapon. It's not like she could take Ward out with a water bottle. They hadn't reached that part of her training yet.

 

“See?” stated Ward, offering her a smile. “Just water.” Uncoiling himself from his crouch, he slowly approached her again with the most relaxed stance he could. “I was serious when I said I would never hurt you, Skye. I won't. You're too good.”

 

“Too good at what, Ward?” challenged Skye, slipping sideways to move away from him. Her legs felt stronger and her head was clearing the last of the cob webs, making it easier to think. “Too good at hacking? Is that what this is? You need me to break into some system?”

 

“No, you're too good of a person,” assured Ward, halting his progress towards her and shoving his hands into his pockets. It made Skye tense, wondering what he could be reaching for. Apparently, he noticed her unease, because he withdrew his hands from his pockets and held both up for her to see. “I'm not armed, Skye. I just want to talk.”

 

“Well, maybe I don't want to talk to you,” countered Skye. It felt childish to phrase things like that, but it was straight forward and a hell of a lot more truthful than anything he'd ever said to her. She was hard pressed not to stick her tongue out, but she resisted. Progress. Ward's smile fell at her words, his jaw ticking a bit in what she thought was frustration. Of course, he had no right to be irritated with her; why the hell should she listen to anything he had to say, much less talk to him? “Go talk to Garrett, I'm sure he wants to hear whatever you wanna say.”

 

The tick worsened for a second, long enough for Skye to suspect her former SO was considering physical force as a means of making her listen. But his hands never twitched. Instead, Ward closed his eyes and drew a deep breath through his nose, holding it for a moment before letting it out slowly. 

 

When he opened his eyes again, those brown orbs met hers. His eyes pleaded with her to listen, hope and something else she couldn't quite identify meeting her head on. For a second, it felt like they were locked in a staring competition: him attempting to plead with her while she refused to budge. Eventually, she closed her eyes against him, the pressure to give in nearly overwhelming. She would give in too, if she kept looking at his face.

 

Apparently, closing her eyes was a way of giving in, because she felt him shift close enough that she could feel the soft puff of his breath and began to speak. “Please Skye, just hear me out. I want you to consider joining me, us.” Her eyes shot open out of shock and instinct more than anything else. Her mouth might have been hanging open too, it was hard to honestly tell. “You wouldn't have to swear loyalty to anyone, just say you've switched sides. No tests, no training, nothing. I promise, that would be all. They just want your help. You're an amazing computer specialist  _and_ you managed to help build a rebelling internet group from the ground up. You could help us so much Skye, and then we could always be together.” 

 

Had he seriously just asked her to join Hydra? Why would he even think she'd entertain that idea? Hydra was the most despicable force on the planet at the moment as far as she was concerned. Was this some kind of a trap? Did he think she was born yesterday? Whatever was going through his head, it clearly wasn't rational. Part of her wanted to actually see if he had a fever. Maybe this was something he'd hallucinated she might say yes to. Was this seriously the whole reason he'd kidnapped her?

 

“Skye?” Ward's voice cut through her thoughts like a knife, even though he kept his voice soft like he was trying to reassure her. It was actually sickening. 

 

His head hung inches from hers when she finally refocused on him. It would be so easy to headbutt him right now that she almost did out of anger and spite. Only the fact that her head was already pounding and slamming it into a hard object like Ward's own skull would probably make it hurt worst stopped her. Her tongue would just have to be her weapon of choice for now. “I can't believe you'd even ask me that. I can't believe you'd actually ask me to join a bunch of Nazi's hellbent on terrorizing the rest of the world and doing god knows what to everyone! Look at what they did to Mike!”

 

“Please Skye, this is a good deal,” insisted Ward, though he leaned further back and even gave her space to move away if she wanted to. It was a little jarring that he'd do that, but it probably was because she'd punched him the last time she got this mad. “Hydra isn't a bunch of Nazi's and they aren't terrorists. They just want to change the world, like you did with the Rising Tide.”

 

Again, she was reduced to looking like a fish, jaw dropping in shock. How dare he even  _suggest_ there was an ounce of similarity between the Rising Tide and Hydra. “Ward, the Rising Tide was about the freedom of information and holding people accountable for their actions. It was about making public the secret actions of the government, which at the time I thought we had the right to know. It wasn't about terrorizing people to control them! It was about doing something good, like SHIELD did. Protecting people.”

 

“That's what Hydra wants to do, too, Skye!” insisted Ward, straightening so he could tower over her. “They helped shape SHIELD. So all that good that SHIELD did? That was Hydra. They're not the bad guys, Skye.”

 

The argument sounded weak, too weak to be coming from a man who believed in a cause. It almost sounded like he was repeating some pamphlet argument he'd been spoon fed. Ward wasn't a stupid man, so why was he repeating some PR line like a mantra? It almost sounded like he was trying to convince himself that what he was saying was true. Something about this whole thing didn't add up.

 

“Yeah?” challenged Skye, forcing her anger away to focus on Ward. “So, what does Hydra want to do, exactly? What's their ultimate goal, beyond taking over the world.”

 

For a moment, Ward didn't respond to her question. In fact, he looked almost like he was struggling for the answer. And for one sickening moment, Skye realized that Ward might not actually know. Somehow, he might have been tricked into agreeing to something that he wasn't even aware of. Was that even possible? He could have left after he found out after all, right? 

 

The look of uncertainty passed from his face after a moment, his self-assured look falling back into place except for his eyes. His eyes were gentle and loving, care trying to over-shadow his uncertainty. It was the last look he should have been giving her.

 

“Hydra just wants to protect everyone,” stated Ward, one of his hands reaching towards her as he blocked any hope of escape she had with his other hand. His fingers brushed against her cheek with a gentleness that didn't match the situation at all. It was creepy and Skye didn't close her eyes only because she didn't want to appear to flinch. The look he was giving her cut deep though, and part of her still wanted to wrap him in her arms. It was the part that still didn't want to admit he was a lying psychopath. The part that said there was something more to this whole thing than what she knew.

 

“Protect them from what, Ward? Themselves?” challenged Skye. She wasn't even sure why she was still talking to him; it wasn't like she actually cared about his views on Hydra. But some part of her needed to hear his answer, needed to understand how he could just abandon the team like he had. Needed to understand how he could abandon _her_ so easily. Needed to know why.

 

“If necessary, yes,” confirmed Ward, his voice soft as he spoke. The look in his eyes was almost painfully gentle, like he was desperate to make her understand. And something in her said it was real. “They want to change the world.”

 

His answer made Skye want to growl. How could he be so blind? “SHIELD was changing the world. They were changing the world by helping people. They were doing  _good_ things. You guys want to control people.” Shaking her head, she slid against the wall in an attempt to escape Ward's reach. He let her move away, dropping his hand from her cheek. His eyes remained locked on her though, following her every move like a predator does prey. “You want to use fear to control people. You're the textbook definition of terrorists.”  


“C'mon Skye,” sighed Ward in that way he used at times he thought she was being childish. There was frustration in his voice too though; he was getting tired of arguing. “They aren't terrorists.”

 

“But you are?” growled Skye, moving away from the idea of Hydra and turning the light onto Ward. The way he kept saying 'they' and 'Hydra' wasn't normal. He was burying his associations by referring to Hydra in the third person, but why?

 

“No,” growled Ward, boxing her in again and forcing her to press back against the wall as he leaned towards her. His hands rose to rest on either side of her head, face inches from hers. “I'm not a terrorist or a Nazi, Skye.”

 

“So why are you with Hydra?” pressed Skye, her own growl escaping in frustration. “Why are you running around with a group of Nazi terrorists if you're not a Nazi or a terrorist?” Her voice rose as she spoke, her irritation and pain getting the better of her. She wanted to the truth and his unwillingness to share was overwhelmingly frustrating. 

 

Ward's jaw began to tick, marking his own irritation with the situation. Good. Yes, there was the chance he would hurt her, but there was a better chance he'd yell at her. A better chance he'd give himself away out of anger. On the bus, he could have grabbed her, choked her, hurt her to get the password he needed. He could have hurt her just because she was making him mad. But he said he never would and she was just gonna hope that applied to now as well.

 

“Because they aren't Nazi's or terrorists,” insisted Ward again, his arguments beginning to sound weaker and weaker as he repeated them like some lifeline. “They're just a group of people trying to change the world! They're trying to change things for the better, rather than just letting the same political crap just keep dragging us down! Look, we've already taken out several dangerous drug lords and we're looking at technology that will save people! They're doing _good_ things!”

 

“Through violence and threats!” repeated Skye, her voice rising further. “I thought you were better than that, Ward! Look at what they did to Mike! What they're doing to him is torture and blackmail to _make him do what they want!_ Isn't that what your brother did? And your father and mother? Beat the crap out of you and terrorized you so you'd do what they wanted? Why the hell would you ever wanna be like that!”  


For a moment, silence filled the room, broken only by their harsh breathing. The look on Ward's face shot through so many turns, it was hard to determine what he was thinking. And in that moment, Skye wondered if she'd gone too far. If she'd pushed too hard and he was about to kill her.

 

But as shock faded to rage and then horror, he never moved. Like his body couldn't decide how to react. The fists beside her head clenched and unclenched spasmodically for several moments until the horror solidified into something closer to realization. And then denial slid into place and she knew. He couldn't actually process his actions for what they were. He didn't actually realize what he was doing or what he was becoming. There was no way for him to know.

 

“I'm not like them.” The words were so quiet, Skye had to strain to hear them. The tension in his voice was palpable, stiff. Horror mixed with anger and maybe just a little desperation. “I'm not them. I'm not like my brother or my father.”

 

“Really?” whispered Skye, keeping her voice dead and disbelieving. It was hard to keep her voice flat as he began to crumble before her, but she knew he needed this. Whatever had been done to him was worse than she ever imagined. The actual horror of what he'd potentially faced growing up was settling in her mind and the realization that he was probably raised to use violence to solve every problem was more horrifying than anything else she could have imagined. “You really think what you people did to Mike isn't abuse? That turning him into a weapon wasn't some twisted and sick form of brainwashing or blackmail? That it's _okay_ to treat a living person like that? _You kidnapped and threatened his son._ You've implanted a damn _bomb_ in his head. How the hell is that anything other than abuse?”

 

“I didn't do that!” snarled Ward fiercely, his face suddenly jammed directly in Skye's to the point that their foreheads touched. The jolt made her drop the water bottle, splattering water across both their legs. Ward didn't notice. The hands still beside her head clenched into fists as he glared at her hard. “I didn't do that and I didn't join Hydra because I like their tactics! I did it for John! I did it _to save John_. _I'm not like my family and I'm not a terrorist!_ ”

 

And there was the truth Skye had been looking for. It all led back to his SO. He wasn't actually involved in Hydra because he agreed with Hydra, he was involved because something was wrong with Garrett. Part of Skye completely relaxed at that realization. He wasn't a terrorist and he wasn't some psychopathic serial killer (well, he was, but not because he actually  _was_ ); he was like a son desperately trying to save his father. Garrett, the man who trained him, who gave him a chance; a man who'd probably manipulated him just as much as his own family had. And Ward was too screwed up to see it. That knowledge hurt, making Skye want to back down. 

 

But she couldn't. After all he'd done, she couldn't back down and just let him go without realizing what he'd done. “You killed Koenig in cold blood, killed who knows how many others. You betrayed us. Hell, you tried to kidnap me, manipulate me into unlocking the hard drive for you. All so you could do what, steal SHIELD secrets? So what, that Hydra could make better guns? So they could make more Mikes?”

 

“We needed the formula for GH-345,” stated Ward quietly. His body was still tense but there was something about the way he was standing that felt wrong. Like he was buckling under the realizations she'd laid out before him. “John needed it. He's dying Skye. He's dying and Hydra is the best chance he has to find a solution.”

 

“Why do you care?” whispered Skye quietly, searching his face for anything that could give her a clue about what was going through his head. “Ward, if Garrett recruited you to Hydra, if he's the one who's been putting this 'change the world' crap in your head about a Nazi terrorist organization, then he's not a good guy.”

 

“I care because he took me in,” growled Ward, some of the anger from earlier rising up again. But it was no where near as intense as before, the anger largely quelled by horror. “He got me out of a bad place, trained me, brought me into SHIELD. He saved me.”

 

His answer was like a punch to the gut. Garrett was his savior, the guy who'd pulled him out of hell. Maybe even offered him stability. And Garrett was Hydra. The man had twisted Ward into a monster he could use, and it made Skye sick. “No, Ward, he didn't save you. He destroyed you.”

 

“No,” denied Ward, shaking his head furiously. “No, he made me stronger. He made me a man.”

 

“No, he didn't,” pressed Skye softly, trying to draw Ward's eyes back to hers. Any thoughts of staying cold and detached had flown out the window as soon as Ward had claimed Garrett saved him. “Ward, Garrett didn't make you a man, he made you a weapon. I don't know everything he did to you, but it didn't make you a man. You were already a man in your own right before he got his hands on you. There's no way you couldn't have been. I'd even bet you were a _good_ man and that you can still be a _good_ man.”

 

She wasn't sure if she actually believed the last part. Part of her wanted to think he was a good man somewhere deep inside. He'd certainly fought to keep her safe against Mike, that much she'd seen pretty clearly. It was why she'd been unable to get rid of the photo of him, the one May had caught her staring at. 

 

For a long moment, Ward just stared at her with the same look he'd given her in Providence: like she was a goddess, his salvation. It  _hurt_ because she didn't want to think of herself as being anyone's salvation. She was barely able to keep herself together some days; the idea of being someone else's anchor was overwhelming.

 

Pressure on her lips broke through her thoughts. It took her a second to realize Ward was kissing her, his lips rough where they pressed to hers. One of his hands slipped into her hair, not so much holding her head as trying to establish as much contact as he could. It was weird, gentler than any of the other times they'd kissed. And the feeling of it, the way her body relaxed under his even though she shouldn't be, the way he fit against her like a damn puzzle piece, scared her. It scared her.

 

He was gone before she could respond, pressing his face into her hair as the hand that had slipped into the dark strands tightened a little. “Skye, I-” 

 

The sharp sound of a door being thrown open silenced Ward immediately, his body jerking to cover hers. Protecting her. His head turned sharply towards the door, searching for the source of the noise. 

 

Mentally, Skye prayed it was Coulson and the team. She hoped they were here to get her. Maybe with their help, she could convince Ward to leave Garrett. He couldn't just get away with everything he'd done; he was going to have to pay somehow. But maybe, just maybe, they could get him away from Garrett and keep him from doing any more harm. For the first time since he'd betrayed them, she began to think they might actually be able to help Ward, if he would let them.

 

“There you are, Ward.” Garrett's voice cut through the room like a knife, jovial but sharp. He sounded amused, but there was an underlying suspicion that set Skye's hair on end. It was the edge of a predator, knowing he'd trapped his prey. “I was wondering where you'd run off to. Guess you were just getting me a present.”

 

Ward's whole body shifted at Garrett's words and she could practically feel the subservience shutter through him. Feel the way he lowered his head and shoulders, showing Garrett had control. Her strong SO was vanishing before her eyes to give power to a man who didn't deserve it. “I was trying to convince her to join us. With her computer skills, we could do a lot more.”

 

“Good move, kiddo,” applauded Garrett. Skye risked lifting her head and was met with the man's shark-like grin and clear dark amusement. “What'd she say?”

 

Skye opened her mouth to speak but Ward cut her off, lifting his head and giving her a pointed look to be quiet. She shouldn't listen to him anymore, but something in his eyes made her halt. He was pleading with her with his eyes. Pleading for her to trust him to get them out of here, alive. “She didn't choose yet. I was still convincing her when you came in.”

 

“Ah, yeah, a little physical enticement can go a long way,” agreed Garrett. His voice though said he wasn't buying Ward's bs for a second. “Well, let's move this little meeting to somewhere more comfortable. We can show her what Hydra's really capable of.”

 

Nodding, Ward leaned forward a little, like he was going to push away from the wall. “I'm sorry. I'll save you.” Then he was pushing back and taking Skye's arm carefully in his grasp. He looked her over once before looping it over his shoulder, like she needed help to walk. She didn't need it, but she let him guide her arm around his shoulders all the same. Ward had said he was a survivor, and so was she. She knew the advantage of playing weak and helpless when cornered. This wasn't the time to strike, it was the time to make Garrett feel like she couldn't fight back. It would make her life easier.

 

Carefully, Ward began guiding her out of the room, Garrett following them. A small platoon of men was waiting outside and they quickly circled both her and Ward as they headed down the hallway. Even without military experience, Skye could recognize an armed escort. Garrett didn't want them to escape and something told Skye, escape wasn't what Ward had planned right now

 


	3. Escape, From Everything

When someone pushed her into a chair and strapped her in, Skye expected to be tortured. A bag had been thrown over her head before they'd even left the safe house Ward had been using. Following being lifted (presumably by Ward based on the gentle way she was handled) into a car and then driven for what felt like hours and then being lifted out again, Skye had fully expected her fall into the chair to be followed by torture. It wasn't. 

 

Instead, she felt a hand on the bag, just like when she'd been taken from her van, and then it was gone. Ward's face was the first thing she saw, unsurprisingly. The bag from her head was in his hands after all. His eyes were apologetic as he looked at her, like he was sorry he'd had to do this. She didn't want to understand, but somehow she did. And it hurt. 

 

Looking away from her former SO, she chose to focus on trying to figure out where she was rather than Ward's puppy-dog eyes. The room wasn't as bright or dark as she'd been expecting. In fact, it wasn't what she was expecting at all. She was in a barber shop. A damn retro barber shop. What, had they time traveled to the 40's? And what the hell was she strapped to?

 

Glancing down, she realized it was a barber chair. She was strapped to a barber chair. Were they going to torture her by giving her a bad haircut? Seriously, what was this?

 

“Uh, I'm pretty sure a bad hair cut isn't torture,” remarked Skye uneasily, looking for some sign of Garrett as she spoke. Ward had moved out of sight but she could feel him behind her, waiting silently for something. 

 

“Don't worry, we ain't gonna cut off that pretty hair of yours.” Garrett's voice held amusement and just the edge of a threat. 'Play along or get hurt' was what he was actually saying. “Ward would probably whine about it if we did.”

 

There was a growl from Ward, faint but there. If it was aimed at Garrett or the idea of Skye's hair being cut off, she didn't know. But none the less, the growl precluded his increased presence behind her by seconds. He was so close, she could actually feel his chest brush her arm on occasion when he breathed.

 

“I'd probably be pretty mad myself,” remarked Skye, keeping her voice as light as possible. It was hard to remain calm though, knowing she was still probably going to be tortured.

 

Garrett just shook his head and chuckled. “Yeah, I'd imagine you probably would be.” Turning his back on her, Garrett headed towards a collection of barber's tools. “You gonna ride down with her or let her go on her own?”

 

It took her a second to realize the comment was aimed at Ward and not her. Behind her, she heard her ex-teammate shift closer to the chair, one of his hands coming to land on her upper arm. “I'm going down with her.”

 

“Suit yourself, kid,” dismissed Garrett, shaking his head before he tugged what looked like a jar of combs forward.

 

Beneath her, the chair hissed for a second before it began to slowly spin and sink into the ground. Skye tensed immediately, not exactly relishing the idea of being lowered in an unknown pit via barber chair. Ward's hand on her arm squeezed gently, reassuring her that he was there. His presence was only reassuring in the sense that if they were planning to drop her suddenly to her death, he'd be coming with her. His words about being a survivor echoed through her mind; he wouldn't be riding down with her if they were going to kill her on the way. Well, unless he was going to do it.

 

“Just relax Skye,” murmured Ward beside her head. She hadn't even noticed he'd moved to lean forward. “It's just like an elevator. We'll be down there soon and then we'll let you out.”

 

“But not let me go,” growled Skye, turning her head as best she could to glare at him. “You're not gonna let me go.”

 

Ward winced, glancing downward in what could only be described as chagrin. “I didn't know he was going to find us, Skye. Otherwise I wouldn't have take you there.”

 

“But you would have still kidnapped me,” countered Skye, her eyes narrowing as they looked at his down-turned face. She began pulling at the restraints, testing how sturdy they were. “You would have still hit me over the head or drugged me or whatever you did just so you could try to corrupt me into joining your stupid Nazi-”

 

“I did it so I could talk to you,” cut in Ward, halting her rant. Taking a deep breath, he lifted his eyes back to hers. His pleading look was the same as the one he'd given her back in his safe house, when he'd begged her to listen. “All I wanted was to talk with you, Skye. Something about you keeps pulling me back and I wanted to convince you to stay with me so I'd be able to keep you. I wish you weren't involved in this, that we hadn't even found you just so that you wouldn't have to be in danger. I want you to be safe and I don't even know why, but for some reason I can't let you go and I don't want to.”

 

His words nearly broke her heart. Not the part about him wanting to protect her, but the part about not knowing why he was drawn to her. He'd sworn his feelings for her were real, but she couldn't help wondering if he even knew what he was feeling. He had to know what love was, right? You have to know an emotion to fake it. That didn't mean he was used to the reality of it though. And that didn't mean he'd recognize it.

 

For a long moment, they just stared at each other. She searched his face, trying to get a good read on him, but all she was coming up with was confusion, pain, and something harder to place. Self-loathing maybe? Indecision? Worry? It was impossible to say.

 

Light began to leak into the tunnel from below, brightening the space gradually. Ward looked down as the light became brighter, then looked back at Skye. Before she could blink or even react, he leaned forward and quickly kissed her. His lips were gone before she could react, drawing towards her ear as whispered words left his lips. “I'm sorry Skye. I love you.”

 

The beginnings of a room appeared around the edge of the spinning disk the chair was placed on, forcing Skye to remain silent or risk being overheard. Not that she really knew what to say; there isn't a lot you can say to a guy who professes to loving you but who's also kidnapped you and handed you over to a bunch of evil psychopaths.

 

Slowly, she watched as a group of people began to appear as the chair slipped further out of the tunnel. Maybe twenty guards, all standing around them as the chair continued to lower and finally settled itself the last few feet to the floor. So, no escape here either. Great.

 

As the chair reached the floor, Ward began to do something behind her with the chair. His lips were near her ear as he did whatever he was doing, giving him the chance to whisper something to her. “Just play along Skye. I'll keep you safe.”

 

Right, sure he would. So far, he'd delivered her into Garrett's hands and landed her in the middle of a Hydra base. This was out of Ward's hands and she knew it. But playing along at least would keep her alive until she could escape, and that was the best she could hope for right now. So she didn't say anything, just continued to glance around at the group and look for some way out. It wasn't like she could have responded verbally to Ward anyway and he'd never bothered to teach her distress signals.

 

The bonds on the chair released her as soon as the disk touched the ground, but Ward's hand was on her arm before she could get up. It probably looked like he was ensuring she wouldn't run, but the grip was too light. If she really wanted to get away, she could have. 

 

“Welcome Skye, to our humble little base,” greeted Garrett, offering her that shark smile again as he appeared from within the gathered group of guards. “It's probably not as nice as you're used to, but it's ours and we're doing great things here.” His eyes shifted to Ward then, motioning something to her former SO. “Come on now, Ward, no need to hold the woman down. She's not going anywhere in here, so relax.”

 

Ward shot her a pleading look before his fingers reluctantly released her. He stepped away quietly, giving her the chance to stand on her own, but his eyes remained on her. She just ignored him and pushed herself out of the chair. Her legs felt shaky, but she managed to keep her balance as she stepped out of the chair and faced Garrett head on. Ward stepped up behind her almost immediately, like a guard making sure she didn't escape. Except with him at her back, she felt safer than she had before. 

 

“Now that that bit of discomfort is out of the way, why don't we go talk,” stated Garrett, his voice warm and welcoming. It was almost friendly. “I've got a nice little office we can talk in.”

 

Without waiting for a response, Garrett turned and started through the group of guards. Behind Skye, Ward pressed his hand to her lower back to urge her forward but he didn't move until she started to. His presence at her back never changed. Glancing back, she noted the way he was glaring at every man they passed. It was a very clear message too: 'don't try anything, she's mine'. 

 

Silently, she followed Garrett forward, hoping the man's entourage of Greek mythology lovers would just stay put. Most of them did, with only three men trailing behind Ward as they exited the room and headed into the hallway. It was like a maze from there on, with Garrett leading them through a series of twisting turns that all looked the same. They passed several rooms, all with shut doors, and one with no door at all. Semi-translucent plastic hung from the ceiling, but that was all Skye could see before Ward moved between her and the room, blocking her view. Or maybe blocking her from view; his hand at her back tightened like he thought someone was going to attack her.

 

They passed the room without incident all the same, Garrett finally leading them into a room off to the side of one of the hallways. It was as bland as the other rooms they'd passed, but with more furniture. Everything looked like it was held over from a military yard sale- all dark greens, browns, and blacks. A good chunk of it was probably SHIELD, in all actuality. A black couch sat in the middle of the room, facing two arm chairs which sat with their backs to a heavy duty desk, also flanked by two chairs at the front. There was one bookshelf at the wall and bare-bulb sconces hung from the walls. For an office, it felt weird. For a bad guy's hide-out, it felt almost tasteful. 

 

He motioned for Skye to take a seat as soon as she entered with Ward, but held up his hand when one of the guards tried to enter too. “Wait outside, we're just gonna have a little chat.”

 

The guard looked reluctant to leave, but a pointed look from Garrett had him stepping back outside again and closing the door. As soon as the handle clicked shut, Garrett's attention turned onto her and Ward. His eyes bounced between them curiously before he motioned towards the sofa. “Please Skye, take a seat.”

 

She wanted to stay standing, to stay on her guard, but Ward's hand gently pushed her towards the sofa. When she glanced back to glare at him, he just nodded. “It's alright. We're just going to talk.”

 

“She and I are just gonna to talk,” corrected Garrett, sticking his arm between her and Ward. Again, he shot Skye a pointed but shark-like look. If that was supposed to be friendly, he failed. “Please Skye, sit down. We'll talk in a moment. I just need to take care of something first.”

 

Reluctantly, Skye moved towards the couch and took a seat, carefully watching Garrett and Ward. Ward tried to follow her, but Garrett's outstretched arm stopped him. “You're staying right here, kid. I'll deal with you later.” The way Ward stiffened made Skye shudder. Whatever Garrett had planned, Ward was clearly familiar with it and it wasn't good. God, they needed to get him out of here. Get him somewhere safe where he could get actual help.

 

“So, Ward said you two were discussing your loyalties,” remarked Garrett, remaining where he was by Ward. “We could definitely use a smart, resourceful woman like you on board. That encryption of yours was impressive. Even my best hackers couldn't crack it.”

 

“No point in encrypting something if anyone can break it,” remarked Skye, her fear and tension making her snarky. She expected Garrett to stride across the room and slap her with the way his jaw ticked. His reaction was more horrifying though. 

 

Instead of stalking across the room and striking her, Garrett gave her a shark smile, turned around, and hit Ward in the stomach hard enough to make him double over. The smirk on his face said he didn't regret it either. Skye didn't realize she'd made a sound until she saw Garrett look up at her with a 'got you' smirk. 

 

“Alright Skye, this is how this is going to work,” started Garrett, stepping over Ward's crumpled form as the man tried to regain his breath. “You're gonna drop the attitude and be frank with me. Otherwise, well, you know the consequences. Got it?”

 

Looking down at Ward as the man tried to struggle to sit up, Skye tried to stop the way her stomach churned sickeningly. This was like the Bus with Mike all over again. Watching Ward stuffer with her as the only one who could stop it. Except who knew how far Garrett would go. The man had banked on Skye saving Ward before, he'd probably risk Ward's life now if Skye didn't cooperate. It made her stick. 

 

“Did you hear me?” Garrett's voice was rapidly loosing its friendly tone. Turning, he kicked Ward in the side again, knocking the man back to the floor. 

 

“Got it,” confirmed Skye shakily, her eyes locked on Ward. Maybe he was pretending to be hurt, maybe it was all an act to get her to cooperate. Except he didn't look like he was pretending and Garrett looked a little too pleased for it to be an act.

 

Sauntering over, Garrett stopped when he was standing over Skye. His lips were tilted up into a smirk and his hands were quickly shoved into his pockets. “So, what's this Ward tells me about you coming to our side of the field?”

 

Gulping a little, Skye's eyes shot to Ward quickly before she refocused on Garrett. “He wanted to talk with me about it. Said he could get me in without a problem. No tests or anything...”

 

Nodding a bit, Garrett offered her a pleased smirk before he took a seat next to her on the sofa. “I don't think that would be a problem. We already know you're useful. Your computer skills alone surpass anything we have.” Leaning forward on his forearms, Garrett offered her a grin. “So, what made you change your mind?”

 

Behind Garrett, Skye caught a glimpse of Ward as he managed to push himself to his feet. His eyes met hers over his SO's head, nodding for her to answer. Whatever she said though, she had to make sure it wouldn't get Ward struck again. 

 

“Well, it was like Ward said,” started Skye carefully, eying Garrett nervously. She didn't like him so close. “He was convincing me that you guys are the winning side...”

 

“Really?” asked Garrett curiously, slipping closer. “Because that sure as hell wasn't what it sounded like when I walked up to the door.” 

 

Skye's stomach almost fell out. Oh god, how much had he heard? Would he kill them both? Or just her? She didn't get a chance to respond though before he continued.

 

“In fact, what _I_ heard sounded more like you trying to convince Ward that I didn't love him like the son he is,” continued Garrett, his eyes darkening even as his wicked grin spread. Skye tried to back away, tried to slide further away on the sofa. “And I just have to say, you're completely wrong on that one, hacker girl.” 

 

Pushing to a standing position, Garrett shifted around to loom over Skye where she sat on the couch facing the door. “In fact, I'll have you know that everything I do is for him. It all helps make him stronger, better. He will be the best agent ever once he finishes letting go of these weak sentiments he clings to. But that's not the issue here.” Leaning forward, he braced his hands on either side of Skye's head, blocking Ward from her view. “The issue here is what I should do with you.”

 

“Garrett, just let her go.” Ward's voice cut through the room, pleading with his SO. “She's not a threat. She doesn't know where we are, didn't even know where I had her. She's not a risk to us.”

 

“That's your sentimentally talking, Ward,” scolded Garrett, glancing at Ward over his shoulder. Skye took the moment to glance around, trying to find a way to escape. She needed to get away from Garrett. “I thought we'd settled that.”

 

“It's not sentiment,” argued Ward, his voice growing stronger as he managed to finish getting his breath back. “I brought her to the safe house because I wanted to convince her to join us. She's an asset, give her a chance.”  


“We can't trust her, Ward,” countered Garrett, pushing back into a standing position and pulling a gun from the back of his jacket. His eyes met Skye's, the look there making her stomach drop. A cruel smirk curled across his lips, promising she wouldn't like what came next. “Now, are you gonna actually do what you're told this time or do I have to do it myself?”

 

Ward made a noise that might have been distress, but Skye couldn't really tell or even see him. All she could see was the gun in Garrett's hand. Her mind flashed back to Quinn, to being shot in the stomach. The pain and creeping cold. It terrified her before and this time, she wasn't going to survive.

 

A thud cut through the room, followed by a blinding flash and crack of thunder. For one terrifying moment, Skye thought she'd been shot again. But the ringing in her ears didn't fade like it had before, nor did pain bloom anywhere in her body. The world was still white, but she could move. She was alive. 

 

Something grabbed her before her vision could clear, a hand yanking her from the sofa and curling around her neck before the cold metal of a gun was pressed to her head. Her back met a hard surface, unforgiving in places and softer in others. She wanted to struggle, but knew this close that whoever had her could just shoot her immediately. The surface she was pressed to vibrated, but she was still too disoriented to figure out why.

 

Slowly, the buzzing in her ears began to die back, allowing sound to filter in. She could hear people shouting, but couldn't make out the words. One of the voices was familiar though. It sounded kind of like AC; she remembered how distorted he sounded when he'd found her bleeding on the ground of Quinn's home. Oh god, what if that's what was happening this time? But she wasn't in pain except for her ears and a headache that was setting in.

 

The bright white of the room had faded to a mix of lights and darks as whatever had happened to her vision began to clear. She could make out three blobs that kept moving across from where she was being held, but she couldn't make out who they were (with the way they were moving, it was definitely a question of who). After a few moments more, her hearing cleared enough that she could distinguish words from noise and her vision was good enough that she could make out the people across the room.

 

Coulson and Triplett stood across the room, both looking more than a little stressed. Coulson had his gun pulled, but it wasn't pointed at Garrett and her. It was pointed at Ward, who was currently being subdued against the ground by Triplett. Whatever shouting had been occurring before had fallen silent for the moment. 

 

Before her, Coulson cocked his gun and leveled it at Ward's head. His voice was little more than a dark growl when he spoke, the most threatening Skye had ever heard from him. “Let her go, Garrett. Otherwise I shoot your specialist.”  
  
Behind her, Garrett laughed, his chest rumbling beneath her back. The blatant disregard for Ward's safety made her stomach twist. “Come on now, Phil. You aren't going to shoot him.” She could hear the grin in his voice, picture the menacing look on his face even with him behind her. It was the voice of a man who knew he'd won. “Would you really shoot your own son?  
  
Any other noise in the room momentarily disappeared for Skye as complete shock overtook her. Could was Ward's father? _Coulson_ ? Their Coulson? Skye's own stomach heaved as she looked between Coulson and Ward, her mind trying to draw connections between the two. Okay, yes, they looked kind of alike and when she thought about it, they even had some identical personality traits and skills. But, Garrett had to be making this up. There was no way that Coulson could have a kid and not know it. It's Coulson; she couldn't imagine the man not at minimum using protection.

 

Across the room, she could see Ward staring at Garrett like the man had slapped him. Maybe he honestly had. Finding out the man you'd been working against is actually your father had to be the biggest shock of her former SO's life. The gun pointed at Ward's head began to waver, drawing Skye's eyes up to Coulson, who had paled sharply from moments before. His eyes were wide and his breathing was far more rapid than it had been just minutes before. He looked just as thrown as Ward. Only Triplett seemed to be unaffected, though even he looked like he'd just swallowed a bug.   
  
“What?” Coulson's whisper didn't sound certain, it didn't even sound intentional. In fact, if she had to guess, it wasn't. It was an uncontrolled reaction to hearing something so shocking it was impossible to believe.  
  
“You know Phil, you really should keep better track of the women you sleep with,” continued Garrett, digging in further to the wound he'd inflicted. “I know there have been a lot, but that's no excuse for not ever bothering to say hello to your own kid.”

 

“You're lying.” It was Ward who spoke up, not Coulson. “He's not my father. He's nothing like my father.”

 

“Oh come on, Ward, I know you aren't that innocent,” scoffed Garrett. “It's called an _affair_. Something your mom had with Phil here when we passed through town once. I almost had her but she decided Phil was better.” That grin was back in his voice, like he was taking great pleasure in torturing all of them. “Hell, you were almost my kid when you think about it.” There was a shifting behind her, but she couldn't see what he was doing. “You remember that girl, right Phil? Brunette, drunk, flirtatious as hell and pissed beyond belief? It was after the take-down in the ass-end of Main, when we were road-tripping it back to New York because Fury couldn't send a guy to get us.”

 

“I remember,” murmured Coulson, his voice back to normal as he steadied his hand. Beside him, Ward turned his head to stare up at Coulson like he couldn't make sense of what he was being told. “Why should I believe anything you say?”  


“Because I have proof,” taunted Garrett, laughing a bit. “I had your DNA compared to Ward's after the first time I met him. He looked like you, you know. Back when we were kids, fresh at SHIELD. It wasn't exactly hard to believe. So I stole some of his hair and ran the test. Guess what? It came back positive. And when I found that out? I knew it was the best revenge I could take against Fury's favorite. Mold his child into my own vision and use that child to take what I wanted. Turn him into the weapon he could be rather than the prissy child you and he both were. It was brilliant.”

 

Horror filled Skye with each word, her stomach dropping in a churning mass. Garrett had just used Ward like a tool, without consideration for what it would do to him. It was the worst thing that could happen to a person, and Ward had suffered through all of it. Lies, deception, all for one narcissistic man's revenge.

 

“No,” whispered Ward, horror filling his voice. “Why wouldn't you tell me something like that?”

 

“Because you didn't need to know,” replied Garrett with a shrug. “It wouldn't have made a difference. He couldn't have made you the man that I did.”

 

“No, he would have made him better,” choked out Skye, the arm on the her throat making it hard to talk.

 

The arm tightened for a moment, almost cutting off her air but just barely not. Instinctively, her fingers reached up to grab at the pressure, but his arm was unrelenting in it's presence. Across the room, she heard Coulson shouting along with Ward.

 

“Let her go!” 

 

“Skye, don't provoke him!”

 

Garrett's arm loosened a moment later, his gun pressing harder into her skull. So hard she was forced to tilt her head with the pressure. “Now that we've established who's in control here, I'll say it again Phil. Let. Ward. Go. I have no issues splattering your little special project's brains across the floor.” As if to drive home the point, the gun beside her head clicked ominously. “I'm gonna count to three and you're going to release Ward. Got it? One. Two-”

 

“Release him, Triplett,” growled Coulson, lifting the gun away from Ward's head. The other agent looked at Coulson like he thought the man had lost his mind but did as he was told all the same.

 

Carefully, Ward stumbled to his feet, shuffling across the room to stand beside her and Garrett. He glanced as Skye as he passed, his eyes apologetic. There was a look in his eyes though: hurt, betrayal, pain, anger....it was a frightening mix. 

 

“Ward, open our escape route,” ordered Garrett, the gun's pressure at her head loosening a bit. “Here's how this is going to work, Phil. You're going to stay here and not follow us and I won't put a bullet through Skye's pretty head.”

 

“Let her go, Garrett,” repeated Phil, gun turned towards them.

 

Predictably, Garrett just laughed. “I'm the one with the hostage now, Phil. So we're doing it my way.” There was a hiss as something opened behind them and she felt Garrett pulling her backwards. He navigated carefully through the room, likely towards the aforementioned escape route. Where it was though, she didn't know. She hadn't even seen anything that looked remotely like it could be an escape route in disguise. The book case seemed too Scooby Doo for Hydra. “Maybe I'll leave her in the tunnel for you, Coulson, maybe not. But follow us, and she's dead.”

 

Rapidly, Garrett pulled her into what looked like a stone tunnel, just like the ones they'd passed through earlier. A door sat open beside the tunnel entrance, the same color and look as the walls in the room had been.  _Well, that explains the escape tunnel._

 

As soon as they were both inside, Ward appeared beside them and pushed the door closed. She heard the locking mechanism click as soon as the wall was resealed, leaving them in the darkened space. Low lighting kept the tunnel lit enough that they could navigate, but just barely.

 

Without a second thought, Garret released his arm from her throat, grabbed her wrist, and began dragging her down the tunnel. The sound of Ward's feet hitting the stone echoed loudly in the enclosed space. It was almost too loud for Skye, but she kept her mouth shut as she tried to formulate a plan of escape. Too bad one wasn't making itself apparent.

 

“It won't take them long to get in,” pointed out Ward as they hurried through twisting turns and corridors. “They aren't just going to let us go.”

 

“Then maybe we should leave your damn rookie dead for them to find,” growled Garrett, slowing a bit to turn on Ward. “This whole mess is your fault. You were the one who kidnapped her, you were the one who couldn't stay away from this hacker. Your sentiment, your weakness.”

 

Ward flinched at Garrett's words, his head bowing at the criticism. It made Skye's heart ache to see him blamed for Garrett's mistakes. If Garrett hadn't dragged her here, they wouldn't have found the base. Well, maybe that wasn't true; she wasn't exactly clear on how her team had found this place to begin with. 

 

“In fact, I should make you finish her off, just for your errors,” continued Garrett angrily, stopping suddenly.

 

For the first time since they'd started on the mad race down the halls, Skye could see Ward perfectly. He looked like he'd been through hell. His face was still ashen with shock, his eyes wide and just a bit scared. His world had just been tipped upside down, and he looked the part. His hands were gripped tightly at his sides, and one of them was wrapped around the Beserker Staff. Where he'd gotten it, or when he picked it up, Skye didn't know. But seeing him with that staff in hand scared her more than Garrett and his gun ever had or would. 

 

A shove sent her forward and a hand forced her to her knees before Ward. Behind her, she could hear Garrett cocking his gun. “It's your mess, Ward. Clean it up.”

 

Lifting her head, Skye's eyes met Ward's. He was just staring at her in a mix of pain and horror. The war in his eyes was clear. He hoisted the staff into his hands, staring at it like it was a foreign object and not a weapon he was intimately familiar with. Then his eyes lifted back to meet hers.

 

His grip shifted to a weapon hold as he loomed before her, eyes never left hers as he moved to grip the staff like a bat, preparing to strike. Her eyes never left his face. If he was going to kill her, he was going to look her in the eyes as he did it. His mouth moved as he stared down at her, whispered words she couldn't hear but could read on his lips all the same. “I'm sorry.”

 

A flash of silver indicated when the staff began moving and she stared at it in anticipation of the blow. But the pain never cameThe staff flew over her head by inches as Grant swung, followed by a loud smack and a shout. A shout from Garrett. Ward had just struck Garrett with the staff, not her.

 

Spinning around quickly, Skye moved as rapidly as she could away from Garrett, just as Ward began slamming the staff repeatedly into the man's head. Blood flew everywhere as the staff viciously hit again and again, blow after blow driving back the man Ward had called SO. Garrett tried to shuffle away as Skye watched, tried to escape the blows. But there was no break in the volley as Ward just continued to hammer mindlessly at Garrett's head. Her stomach turned as she watched, eventually forcing her to turn away as she emptied the contents of her stomach.

 

Anguished cries echoed up as the attack continued, but they weren't Garrett's. Ward's cries were like those of a wild animal being beaten. It was as if each strike was causing him physical harm but he never let up as if he knew what would happen if he did. Moments later, the sounds of the attack ceased, the staff clattering to the ground loudly. It was followed by the sound of something soft hitting the ground and what sounded like a whimper from Ward.

 

Slowly, Skye risked turning around and almost had to turn away again. Garrett's bloody body lay, broken, on the ground of the tunnel. If he wasn't dead yet, he would be soon, that was for sure. There was no way he could survive. His  _skull_ looked like it had caved in under the blows. 

 

“No.” Ward's choked whisper drew Skye's attention, her eyes sweeping over the broken man before her. “What did I do...” His eyes lifted to Skye then, tear filled and lost like those of a child. “What did I do?”

 

Gulping, Skye tried to think of the right thing to say but nothing sounded good. It all just sounded like useless platitudes in her head; like she was glad Garrett was dead. Truthfully, she didn't know how she felt. She'd wanted to see Garrett behind bars, not a broken and bloody mess on the ground. 

 

A strangled, rattling breath was drawn into Garrett's half-caved in chest, followed by an even weaker breath. With each draw, Ward looked like he was breaking further. And with each passing second, Skye waited in tense silence. One of Ward's hands reached for Garrett's, shaking like those of a frightened child reaching for their father's sure grip. 

 

“I'm sorry,” whispered Ward to the broken body before him. “I'm so sorry John. I don't- I don't even know-” His voice broke at that point, becoming little more than choked sounds that were more animal than human. He nearly bent in half over Garrett's broken body, the grief so prevalent in his body that Skye almost forgot the horrible things Garrett had done to Ward. Almost being the key word.

 

Finally, after several minutes, Ward released Garrett's hand with another whispered apology and stood up, turning his back on the dying man. Garrett's breathing was so shallow as to be non-existent at this point; for all Skye knew, he might actually be dead. Turning to Skye, Ward gave her an apologetic look and knelt before her. His hands reached for her face as he leaned forward, trying to draw her close. She let him reluctantly, leaning slowly forward as he drew her closer. She shouldn't let him even touch her, she should have run when he was beating Garrett into a pulp. But seeing Ward breaking like he was, she couldn't bring herself to leave him alone. Whatever had happened to Ward, he wasn't capable of making decisions the way everyone else did. She could see that clearly now. And part of her trusted him not to hurt her, even though she shouldn't. Even though a promise to never hurt her didn't mean anything coming from a traitor, part of her believed him. And that part won out in the end. 

 

Whatever she'd been expecting from him, the sudden press of his lips to hers wasn't it. He just held her there as the seconds ticked by, kissing her softly like his life depended on it. He pulled away after a moment, his eyes sliding to hers as he cupped her head with one hand. “I'm sorry, Skye.

 

Pain bloomed across the back of her head, making her vision swim and darken. She felt Ward lower her to the ground gently, his lips pressed to her forehead. It was the last thing she felt before she slipped completely into unconsciousness.

 


	4. You Aren't Alone

Silence met Skye as she finished her recount of what happened, opening her eyes for the first time since she started. After all, they all saw what came next. She had her questions of course: how had they found her, what were they going to do now, etc. But this just didn't feel like the place to ask, not right now at least. Beyond the fact that the Bus should be coming up any minute, she knew everyone would need a chance to absorb what she'd told them. Hopefully, they'd come up with the same conclusions she had: that Ward, well needing to pay for his crimes, needed help. Whatever they did when they finally caught him, he needed a chance to heal.

 

The looming silence wasn't broken until they reached the Bus, parked in what looked like an abandoned field. At that point, Jemma leaned forward and looked up at Skye with big dark eyes. Her face was full of questions mixed with a bit of worry, but it wasn't anything Skye hadn't been expecting. At this point, they all had questions.

 

“Do you know where Ward went, Skye?” Jemma's question was so soft, it was almost inaudible.

 

Shaking her head slowly, Skye leaned her head against the window of the van and stared out at the surrounding foliage. “He didn't say.”

 

“And there were no clues?” spoke up Fitz curiously. “Not even a little one?”

 

“Not one,” whispered Skye, keeping her eyes trained outside. She didn't have the energy to look at any of her team. The memory of that heavy weight in her pocket came back and for the first time since she woke up, she wondered what it was. Pulling it out of her pocket was out of the question though, at least while the others were around. This thing, whatever it was, had been placed in her care without her knowledge. And for some reason, keeping this secret felt important.

 

“What do you think, sir?” questioned Fitz from Skye's other side, turning his attention to their boss. “Do you think Garrett was telling the truth? That you're Ward's da?”

 

Si mmons' head snapped towards Fitz and, for a moment, her expression implied she was considering hitting her partner. But she didn't, instead opting to turn her focus on AC. As all of them did.

 

Up front, Coulson let out a heavy breath, rubbing his eyes with one hand. “I don't know.” His words were so distressed, so lost, it was painful to hear. This was Coulson, their boss, their leader, and here he was breaking because of the words of a psychopath. “If what he said is true...” His voice trailed off, his eyes focused completely forward.

 

Silently, they waited for him to continue. But when no more words were uttered from his lips, Fitz cleared his throat rather loudly. “Do you remember her, sir? Ward's mum?”

 

Coulson turned his head, blinking dazedly at Fitz for a moment before the question actually seemed to process. Nodding, he leaned back against his seat just as May pulled to a stop along side the Bus. “Yeah, I do. Vaguely, but...” Shaking his head, he climbed from the van silently before May had even turned off the vehicle. Without a word he moved towards the Bus, leaving the others to follow.

 

As soon as he was out of sight, Simmons reached out and knocked Fitz lightly on the back of the head. “Fitz! What were you thinking?!”

 

“I was just curious!” countered Fitz, his voice rising in surprise. “We're all thinking it!”

 

“But the rest of us had the sense not to say it!” exclaimed Simmons unhappily.

 

As the two began bickering in the back seat, May opened her door and slipped from the van. Triplett did the same, offering Skye a hand out as soon as he'd cleared the van. She slid across the seat and took it, not trusting herself to climb out on her own. He gave her a worried look as she climbed from the van, but she brushed it off. She was fine, it was AC and Ward who weren't. They were the two suffering right now and there was only one of them she could do anything to help.

 

Carefully, she started towards the Bus, though May appeared at her side half way there. The pilot didn't help her, but she didn't move passed Skye either, despite how slow she was moving. Instead, May kept pace with the hacker until they reached the Bus. Coulson had already lowered the ramp and both women walked up it at the same pace. As soon as she was in the cargo hold, Skye tried to head for the stairs where Coulson was sure to have gone, but May stopped her with a hand to her shoulder.

 

“Go to the lab, Skye,” insisted May, turning her slightly towards the lab doors. “Let Simmons look you over. You know she'll just hunt you down if you don't.”

 

“And that's the last thing AC needs,” sighed Skye, looking towards the stairs unhappily.

 

Squeezing her shoulder gently, May released Skye's arm and headed for the stairs. “Go talk to him once you talk to Simmons.”

 

“Right,” muttered Skye, resigning herself to waiting in the lab for Simmons.

 

\---------------------------------

 

Triplett had appeared maybe 10 minutes after Skye hopped onto one of the lab tables, half dragging the arguing pair into the Bus. He deposited both in front of the lab before stalking out of the cargo bay shaking his head. Skye could only image his frustration with the pair; they could really space out when they were arguing. As it stood, it took Triplett honking the van's horn as he drove it into the bay for them to actually react. At which point, Simmons realized Skye was in the medical bay waiting and quickly bolted inside.

 

Skye only hadn't interrupted the two because she was trying to be patient about talking to Coulson. The way she saw it, the longer it took her to seek him out, the better off he'd be. Even if she wanted to sneak away and find him, May would probably catch her and drag her back to the lab anyway.

 

So she sat patiently for 20 minutes while Simmons poked, prodded, and scanned her for any number of scary sounding brain conditions and injuries. She spoke when questioned about important stuff, but didn't otherwise talk much. It was too much effort to try to keep up small talk and she was too drained emotionally to handle it. If she weren't so worried about AC, she'd go straight to bed and sleep once Simmons was done. 

 

Instead, she bolted as soon as the woman was finished, moving as quickly as she could towards Coulson's office. All that was running through her head with every step was what state she'd find AC in when she reached him. Of course, if he were actually in any danger, she was pretty sure May would be with him. The thought of walking into her boss' office and finding him broken down in the middle of the room still scared her though. Skye was so intent on reaching Coulson's office, she nearly dashed right past him where he sat in the lounge.

 

In her defense though, he was hard to see.

 

His back was to the stair entrance, body curled into one of the chairs and a bottle of something hard in front of him. The shot glass beside the bottle was unsurprising and if her head weren't still pounding and Jemma wouldn't kill her, she would have joined him. But at least one of them needed to be sober, if only to make sure the other was okay. And given she was the one who was knocked out twice in one day, that was her.

 

Coulson never looked up as she slipped into the chair across from him, her eyes sweeping over his slumped shoulders and down-turned head. One of his hands was wrapped firmly around his shot glass and the other seemed to have permanently taken up residence around the bottle in front of him. It was heartbreaking to see how much pain one man's words could cause.

 

“AC?” She kept her voice soft as she leaned forward, eyes locked on his face.

 

Blue orbs, hazy from alcohol and self-hatred, met her own across the table. “How could I not know I had a child?”

 

Sighing, Skye reached out and gently wrapped a hand over Coulson's around the bottle. “Because Garrett is- was a psychotic asshole who decided to keep that information from you rather than tell you the truth. It wasn't like she contacted you, AC.”

 

“I could have checked in, something....” muttered Phil, shaking his head slowly. “I should have checked on her, made sure this wasn't the case. I should have-”

 

“AC, stop,” ordered Skye, her voice loosing some of it's gentleness in an attempt to snap him back to reality. “Stop beating yourself up over how you didn't know. There's absolutely nothing you can do about that.”

 

Coulson blinked at her, slow and surprised, before dropping his eyes to the glass in front of him again. “It's my fault, all of it. Everything that happened to him, all because I let someone push me into doing something stupid.” Taking a deep breath, he threw back the rest of the contents of his glass and set it aside. “ I remember his mother. We met in a bar. Garrett spotted her first...”

 

\------------------------------

 

-31 years earlier-

 

“Hey, check out that one,” stated Garrett, nudging Phil and pointing across the bar to a woman perched on a stool. She was glaring at her drink, brunette hair pulled up into a tight bun and slim face clearly visible. She was clearly pissed about something, the question was what. “Bet I can get her in the backroom.”

 

One of Coulson's eyebrows shot up, eyes sweeping over to the woman in question. “She'll rip your head off before you get her five feet back.”

 

“Yeah?” challenged Garrett with a smirk, throwing back his drink. “Watch me.”

 

Phil just shook his head as Garrett pushed away from the table and sauntered over to the woman. At first, it actually seemed to be going well. The woman responded to Garrett and even flirted with him. Then Garrett said something that made the woman's face drop into a scowl, and suddenly she slapped him and stood, shouting.

 

Chuckling, Phil watched in amusement as Garrett backpedaled and tried to re-earn his prior favor. It just got him slapped again and shouted at further. The SHIELD agent retreated at that point, returning to the table he'd been sharing with Phil. Garrett's cheeks were bright red, making Phil sputter with laughter.

 

“You're right John,” laughed Phil. “She was eating out of your hand. You should have put money on that move.”

 

“I've love to see you do better, Phil,” challenged Garrett in return, still scowling. “Let's see the Cap fanboy do better.”

 

Glancing at the woman, Phil examined her for a moment before nodding. “Deal.”

 

\------------------------

 

Coulson dropped his head to the table with a groan as Skye just stared at him in surprise. Seriously? A bet? Ward was born because Garrett and Coulson made a stupid bet?  _Wow, no wonder AC feels bad._

 

“AC, it's still not your fault you didn't know about Ward though,” repeated Skye softly, squeezing Coulson's hand softly. “It doesn't sound like even Garrett knew until he met Ward for the first time. So how could you expect to know she'd gotten pregnant? Did you give her your number?”

 

“No,” replied Coulson with a shake of his head. “Not sure I even told her my real name. SHIELD was so new to me at the time, I think I used a fake name. I hadn't even wanted to stop at the bar.” Taking a deep breath, Coulson kept his eyes on his glass as he continued. “And because I let Garrett push me into stopping and sleeping with that woman, all of this happened. I have a son I never got to know who was treated like crap by his own family and our team was torn apart by a man who was turned into a monster by a monster determined to get back at me.”

 

Sighing, Skye shoved a hand into her hair and stared at the man before her. Her mind spun through a variety of platitudes she could offer Coulson, but the reality was that none of them would help make him feel better. Gulping lightly, she leaned forward as a thought came to mind. “What would you have done if you'd know about him?”

 

Coulson didn't pause in his answer. “I would have been there. I would have offered support, even taken him in. I would have raised him.”

 

“You would have been his father,” stated Skye simply, squeezing Coulson's hand softly. “Guess what, AC? That means you would have done the right thing. So stop beating yourself up over something you couldn't predict and had no control over.”

 

“But it's my fault Garrett targeted him,” argued Phil quietly. “Who knows what he did to Ward in his twisted attempt to get back at me.”

 

“Only Ward knows,” agreed Skye gently. “But you can't help what Garrett did to him. Garrett was a psychopath and you didn't know Ward was your son. You can't blame yourself for what he did to other people.”

 

“But he did it because Ward is my son, and if I'd know that then I could have protected him,” argued Coulson with a sigh. “You haven't seen his record, Skye. It wasn't just Garrett who abused him, it was his family, too. And if Garrett brought him in, his entire history was probably doctored. Who knows what else was done to Ward that isn't in his file?”

 

“We don't know,” agreed Skye, shaking her head a bit. “And we can't know unless Ward tells us. But that's my point, AC. We don't know what happened to him, we don't know where he is, and we don't know what he's thinking. And blaming yourself for all of this isn't gonna help you or him. Instead, think about what you'll do when we get him back.”

 

“If he comes back,” sighed Coulson, finally lifting his eyes to meet Skye's. He blinked at her once or twice, then shook his head a little and stood. The set of his shoulders said he was going into father-bear mode, and Skye was his target. “You should be in bed resting.”

 

“Simmons cleared me,” assured Skye, tilting her head back to keep him in view. “AC-”

 

“Simmons might have cleared you of a head injury, but you need to sleep,” stated Coulson firmly. “You were under more stress today than anyone. Come on.”

 

No, she definitely hadn't been under more stress than anyone else. That award went to Ward and Coulson for their roles in 'sudden familial connection'. But she also knew Coulson was done talking for now, and going into father-mode was both a way to end the conversation at hand and make himself feel better.

 

Sighing, knowing that she wasn't going to get out of this, she stood carefully as well and headed for her pod. Well, more like Coulson herded her to her pod, but hey, semantics. Truthfully? She was exhausted and it didn't take a lot of prompting to get her moving. The guilt of leaving Coulson alone still ate at her, though. She didn't want to leave the man who was like a damn father to her alone with his guilt.

 

Reaching her pod, she turned towards the man and gave him a pointed look. “I'm here if you need to talk, AC. You know that, right?”

 

“I know, Skye,” assured Coulson, offering her the barest hints of a smile. “Thank you.”

 

Nodding, Skye opened the door to her pod. “No problem, AC.”

 

“Now get some sleep,” ordered Coulson gently. “You need it more than anyone at this point.”

 

“I'm not sure that's true,” argued Skye, offering him a weak grin. “I bet you guys were working hard all day to find me. I just had to stay alive.”

 

“And that's significantly harder to do,” confirmed Coulson, shooing her into the pod. “Now, get some sleep. You need it.” He turned away before she could argue, heading in the direction of his office. Probably to beat himself up some more, if she had to guess.

 

"You too, AC," stated Skye with a sigh, shaking her head and shutting her door. He didn't want to talk. He'd speak up when he was ready to.

 

As soon as the door clicked into place, she dug her hand into the pocket on her jacket and withdrew the smooth black case. It was worn, unsurprisingly, the leather soft against her skin. She turned it over and over as she walked towards her bed, shedding her jacket and sliding into her bed with the case still in hand.  
  
Flipping open the case, she expected to be met with the standard SHIELD badge or a corrupted Hydra version. Instead, she was met with tattered leather where the badge had been torn free. Only the ID card was left inside. His name, Grant Ward, was scrawled across the top of the plastic, though the SHIELD logo and bar code had been cut off. His picture was next to his name, with all the text below blacked out.  
  
Silently, Skye ran her fingers over the picture before closing he eyes. The weight was wrong, but it was a comfort too. A sign. He wasn't there with them, but that didn't mean he'd forgotten them.

 

Flipping the leather shut, she rolled into her side and slipped the case into her pillow. She needed sleep. Tomorrow was a new day, and she'd need all her strength, like the rest of the team would, for whatever rose up to meet them next.


End file.
